Life,  Marriage

Subtle differences of married life

As of last Sunday, Bo and I have been married for three months. However we have been together for over fourteen years.

Before the wedding, I didn’t think it would change anything in our relationship. I thought of it simply as a formality that people take to make their relationship official in the eyes of the government.

Mostly, a piece of paper, if you will. Which might sound quite negative but let’s be honest, people can be happy in love without ever getting married. We had a strong relationship, to begin with, so I didn’t see much changing.

Before digging even further into a hole I’m publicly announcing how wrong and misguided I was. There, I said it.

I was wrong. 

Anyway, now that I’ve got that off my chest. Below are some things that have changed in our relationship since we got married.

Money

We consult each other before making big cash splurges.

Just after the wedding, we went shopping for milk. Mundane right? We left the shop with a 43 inch TV. “How did this happen?” I hear you ask.

We didn’t have a TV for the entire time we were in Edinburgh. I really wanted to invest in a good set that will last the distance. Tesco was closing down their direct service therefore, their tech items were ridiculously discounted. This helped us make the decision. We discussed it then agreed we could afford it.

More recently, we were in dire need of upgrading our PC. The old PC was 10 years old, and while it served well, it was starting to really show age and struggled with the most basic programs.

I sent a few links over to the hubby and of course, he liked the look of one of them. Again we discussed it and decided to go for it together.

We don’t always splurge big, but before we got married we would have been more inclined to just go ahead and tell the other person later rather than make it a joint decision. 

Housework

Well, this one started long before the wedding but I think both of us make more of an effort now. It also leads nicely into the next point and it’s definitely worth noting.

We share the housework.

It works for us.

We are both out working full time – I work nine to five Monday to Friday; hubby works a mix of day and evening shifts five out of seven days a week so his pattern requires a bit more flexibility than mine.

If maintaining the home was left to one person, one would be exhausted and probably resentful of the other.

Typically if I am working and he has the day off, he will tidy the house and make dinner. If he is working and I have the day or evening free, I will tidy up and make dinner.

It’s all about balance and respecting each other enough to do these little things to help maintain our home. It allows the other to come home and relax after a long day at work, and also it’s a subtle way of saying I love you and I appreciate you.

Balancing each other

ince we got married we have been working as a team more often. Again this ties into the previous points of taking the hubby’s thoughts into consideration and also creating a balance in our home life. 

However, I’m aware I have a tendency to get carried away when I get a notion. I can get very excited and act on impulse. Which, is not always a bad thing, but sometimes certain situations will require a level head (that’s not to say I’m not level-headed at all but you know, I can get ahead of myself sometimes).

Anyway, I’ve found myself asking the hubby’s opinion more when I feel like I may be getting ahead of myself. He is typically more grounded (maybe a little more pessimistic) than I am so the balance works well. 

Likewise, I provide the proverbial boot up the backside for him when he wants to do something but has pretty much talked himself out of it by thinking he’s not good enough to do the thing. 

If you’d like to read more about our quirky, DIY wedding check out my blog about it here.

What do you think? Have you recently got married and noticed things change that you didn’t expect? Let me know in the comments!

Until next time…

Well hello!! I created this blog to share my fitness routines, travel updates, musings on life and offer advice on wedding planning! Drop me a comment and say HI!

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